Whoa! Didja get the numbers off that truck?!?

March 31, 2004 - 6:47 a.m.

Maryann Vallee 8/1/22 - 3/29/04

She was under Hospice care, so when the end was imminent they gave her morphine and made her comfortable for her journey out of this world.

She was never the same after Dad left. My brother had the means to fly out and see her every month, and so he got a clearer picture of how she was doing. I talked to him on the phone yesterday. He told me how she always looked forward to his visits. She lived, near the end, in a group home. It was a single family home in a residential area, with all the feel of a regular house; they even had a big old calm dog who roamed the place. My brother would take her outside when she was up to it. She loved the skies and the people and being out amongst others. It was good to know that she liked her life, as it was. It was also good to know that my brother could do that too because in a way he was representing Newt and I.

We were frustrated by the fact that she never did anything to prolong her life, she was in a steady orbit. Existing. Happy, but waiting. The only one she ever wanted to be with was gone. It seems harsh to say that she wanted her life to end, that wasn't exactly it. I think that her life just lost meaning after my dad died and left her behind in this world. I understood and accepted that a long time ago.

No one in this world has the right to judge how another person decides to live their life.

I hope that she's re-united with Dad and her brothers now and that she's adjusting to her new surroundings. I hope that once she gets used to her new and happier place that she can visit us here somehow. We used to talk about that, she and I. We had a common interest in the spiritual realm; and I'm not talking about Jesus and collection plates. We knew of a world beyond this one and connections that can be made, if one just pays attention to it. Son1 knows about this too, he told me he had a hard time sleeping on Monday morning, and he woke, alert, at about 5:30 Monday morning... knowing something had changed drastically. My telling him about his Grandma later that day confirmed it.

Goodbye Mom, and Hello too.

the last one -*- the next one