Whoa! Didja get the numbers off that truck?!?
September 23, 2003 - 11:02 p.m.
Fuckers
Remember this entry?Did the director of Quality Assurance blow in an impassioned call to my house, begging me to please come back to the Moen Family?
No.
Did he write a letter apologizing for the shitty quality they build into each and every faucet they make? And that my dissatisfaction with their shitty faucet will bring shame down upon his family for generations to come?
No.
JohnnieV, you mean to tell me he didn't even offer to come to your house and personally install a top-o-the-line Moen faucet (of your choosing) in hopes of re-capturing your plumbing fixture heart?
Nope.
What's this world coming to, when a good old fashioned crank letter produces no results at all?
Remember the Bic pen commercial in the sixties, with the figure skater? They strapped a Bic pen to her skate, she went out on the ice and did her thing. She returned, they unfastened the pen, warmed it under some dramatic-looking flame thingy and the durn thing wrote! Golly!
I was about 13 when they ran this commercial. So I took a Bic pen downstairs to the basement and dragged it around on the concrete floor for a few minutes in my own brand of Torture Test. The whole damn tip was gone. So I wrote a letter to Bic, describing my own scientific findings, dropped the pen in the envelope and mailed it off.
About a month later I got a letter back from the company, thanking me for my interest! They had an equally scientific explanation about the hardness of the Dyamite Ball and the softness of the brass head it was mounted in, blah blah blah (balls, head... remember, I was 13). They even tossed in a few free pens for my trouble.
Ah, those were the days!
Current Terr Alert Level
OMG, She's agonna blow!
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