Whoa! Didja get the numbers off that truck?!?

November 30, 2001 - 7:38 a.m.

It�s beginning to look a lot like�

Christmas.

Yeah, well I don�t feel like it. There was only one other time when I didn�t �feel like it� and that was 1996, when my ex moved my kids out of the house. She moved everything out on December 10. I forced it though; I got a little tree and taped up all the Christmas decorations that my kids had made at school all over the bare walls.

Well I don�t feel like it this year either. But I did put up the only outside decorations I ever put up: a single candle in each window. I go for understated Christmas decorations. You won�t see any PVC light up snowmen or Santas in my front yard. Plus, you can put these �outside decorations� up and take them down in any weather. No ladders required.

I got these candles long ago, when we lived in that old house in Michigan. They�re the plastic, made in China variety with that fake �wax running down the candle base� look. I put a clear bulb in each one and place it in the center of the windowsill. I had to modify the cords on them to suit each window and to accommodate the lack of outlets in that old house.

Back when the kids were small I went through a lot more light bulbs than I do these days. Three year old Son1 was fascinated with the process of beating the bulb on the glass window to watch it get really bright, and then go out. What fun! And I remember the time I walked into the parlor to see three year old Son2 with his chubby little cheeks aglow. It wasn�t from being outside in the cold December weather; it was a bit more alarming than that. He had one of those candles stuck in his mouth!

See these gray hairs? I�ve earned every one.

When we moved to the big new sterile house, I modified the wiring to make it fit those windows. And then when I moved from there to this house, I re-wired �em again. And two years ago I went one step further and got timers for each one.

But I still don�t feel like it.

the last one -*- the next one